Blue Heart

For my brother Aref, 1963- 1981

©AzitaMofidian(Paperwings)

My heart is blue because I miss you so deeply. Each thought of you feels like a heavy, suffocating weight on my chest, as if my heart might just stop. I can never erase the memory of your face, the way you looked at me for the last time through the cold bars of that prison. I was there with Mom and Dad, holding back tears. You stood there, tall, handsome, calm, and shrewd. That day, your eyes said the goodbyes your voice couldn't, and I didn't realize it would be our final moment together. Tears rolled down my face as I stepped away backward, not having the heart to turn my back on you. Times up!, the guard said. Leaving you there was the hardest thing I've ever done.

Since that day, my life has felt like a series of empty moments, each slipping by without meaning. They took you away from me, and the sun hasn't shone since then. I exist in an endless twilight, trapped in the pain of losing you, haunted by the absence of your light. Every day serves as a painful reminder of the love we lost too soon. And what was your crime? Wanting freedom—for your country, for all of us.

We don't forget. We don't forgive.

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